Dating and Romance in the Bible

Though the Bible times doesn’t talk directly about dating, it does include plenty of examples of couples meeting and falling in love. Some, like Jacob and Rachel meeting at the local watering hole, are pretty timeless. Others, like Ruth approaching Boaz, are different. Yet, despite the differences in customs, falling in love is timeless.

Adam and Eve

Our first biblical love story is Adam and Eve. They were created as man and wife from the beginning. Still, I like Adam’s response when he first eyed Eve.

“This is now bone of my bones
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called ^[i]Woman,
Because she was taken out of^]Man.”
Genesis 2:23

Adam and Eve had a true fairy-tale romance of perfect love in the beginning, but sin and hate led to difficult times for the pair. Being kicked out of their house, having one son kill the other, watching the world around them deteriorate, getting more and more evil, couldn’t have been easy, but they stayed together and were blessed with another son whom they praised God for.

Isaac and Rebekah

Isaac and Rebekah’s marriage was an arranged marriage. Abraham didn’t want Isaac marrying a Canaanite woman, so he sent his servant in search of a Hebrew wife for Isaac.

The servant traveled to Abraham’s homeland in search of a suitable mate. He wanted to make sure he made the right choice, so he asked God for a sign. He went to the well outside the city and prayed that when he asked the young women for a drink that the right woman would offer to get water for his camels as well.

Beautiful Rebekah was the answer to that prayer. The servant presented her with gifts of jewelry, then she and her maids went with him to meet Isaac.

When they got to the fields where Isaac was working, Rebekah dismounted from her camel and covered her face with a veil before meeting Isaac. From there, Isaac took her into his mother’s tent, and she became his wife. We’re told he loved her and she was a comfort to him after the death of his mother.

Jacob and Rachel

After Jacob tricked Esau out of his blessing, Rebekah sent him to her homeland to be safe from Esau’s wrath and to find a suitable wife.

Just as the servant met Rebekah at the well, so also did Jacob meet Rachel there. After rolling away the stone covering the well, he told her who he was, kissed her, and wept.

It appears to have been love at first sight, or at least a pretty quickly developing romance. When Laban asked Jacob what he should pay him for working for him, Jacob offered to work for seven years in exchange for Rachel’s hand in marriage, “and they seemed only a few days to him because of the love he had for her.”

Samson and His Unnamed Wife

When we hear of Samson, we immediately think of Delilah, but Samson had an unnamed Philistine wife before he ever met Delilah. He went to Timnah, saw a beautiful woman, and told his parents to get her for him as a wife.

They tried to convince him to instead choose an Israelite woman, but he wasn’t interested. So Samson and his parents went to meet the young woman, and she pleased him. They made arrangements to marry.

We’re told it was the custom for the bridegroom to throw a big party, but it’s interesting that he had no friends to come to the party, so the Philistines provided thirty men to come to his weeklong feast.

He entertained his guests by offering up a riddle and a prize to anyone who could solve the riddle. When the Philistine men couldn’t solve the riddle, they asked his bride to find out the answer. But despite her pleas and tears, he refused to tell her until the last day when he finally gave him.

He didn’t handle it well when they solved the riddle, so he went back to his parent’s house, and her father gave her in marriage to Samson’s best man.

David and Michal

King Saul originally offered up his oldest daughter Merab to be David’s wife since he was fighting the Philistines. Only David didn’t feel worthy of marriage to a princess, so Saul gave her to wed another man.

Then Saul found out his younger daughter Michal was in love with David, so he offered up her instead and was ready for them to marry immediately.

Again, David felt unworthy, so Saul suggested he kill a hundred Philistines to show himself worthy. David did as he was asked and took Michal as his wife. We’re told that Michal loved David, but we never see any indication that the feeling was mutual. And, of course, we know that her feelings of love didn’t last long.

Boaz and Ruth

Ruth was working in the fields to support her mother-in-law Naomi when Boaz noticed her. We know that he was considerably older than her, and so he called her daughter and watched out for her. Ruth was humbled by his attention.

They ate lunch together and got to know each other. When she went back to work, he told his workers to leave extra grain for her to glean.

When Naomi learned Ruth had met Boaz, she got excited. She pointed out that Boaz was their kinsman redeemer.

Ruth gleaned through the end of the barley season. Then Naomi came up with perhaps the strangest romantic advice ever. Whether this was the custom, or just something Naomi came up with, it accomplished its purpose.

Ruth and Boaz married.